“Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.”
Sam Keen
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Humor Quotes
58 quotes on humor and wit — from the classics to the everyday.
“Your body is not a temple, it's an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
Anthony Bourdain · Kitchen Confidential, 2000
“The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
“A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
“There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”
Oscar Wilde · The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1890
“The only way to behave to a woman is to make love to her, if she is pretty, and to someone else, if she is plain.”
Oscar Wilde · The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895
“He was always late on principle, his principle being that punctuality is the thief of time.”
Oscar Wilde · The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1890
“I can resist everything except temptation.”
Oscar Wilde · Lady Windermere's Fan, 1892
“The love of truth lies at the root of much humor.”
Robertson Davies
“The physician can bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines.”
Frank Lloyd Wright · New York Times Magazine, 1953
“Weekends are a bit like rainbows; they look good from a distance but disappear when you get up close to them.”
John Shirley
“Give a man a fish and he has food for a day. Teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him for the entire weekend.”
Zenna Schaffer
“There is little chance that meteorologists can solve the mysteries of weather until they gain an understanding of the mutual attraction of rain and weekends.”
Arnot Sheppard
“You bought me to score goals, not to play football.”
Zlatan Ibrahimovic · To a manager during his career, widely reported
“An injured Zlatan is still better than a fit Zlatan.”
Zlatan Ibrahimovic · Press conference, 2012
“A lot of people just think of me as a landscape painter, which is quite boring.”
David Hockney · Interview, 2000s
“I always hear 'punch me in the face' when you're speaking, but it's usually subtext.”
Sherlock Holmes · BBC Sherlock, Series 2, Episode 1: A Scandal in Belgravia, 2012
