“Think before you speak. Read before you think.”
Fran Lebowitz · The Fran Lebowitz Reader, 1994
Category
Humor Quotes
37 quotes on humor and wit — from the classics to the everyday.
quolira
quolira.com
“People think I'm joking all the time. Sometimes I am. Sometimes I'm not.”
Oliver Tree
“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
Mae West
“I've actually not read any books on time management.”
Elon Musk · Reddit AMA, 2015
“The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the classroom.”
Robert Frost
“A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes.”
Robert Frost
“The secret of being a bore is to tell everything.”
Voltaire · Sept Discours en Vers sur l'Homme, 1738
“The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.”
Voltaire
“Common sense is not so common.”
Voltaire · Philosophical Dictionary, 1764
“God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.”
Voltaire
“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
Albert Einstein
“I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning the day difficult.”
E.B. White
“Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.”
Sam Keen
“Your body is not a temple, it's an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
Anthony Bourdain · Kitchen Confidential, 2000
“The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
“A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
